This Is the Skin I’m In: Embracing Your Psoriasis

From healthcentral.com

Four psoriasis warriors share how they found their confidence 

Psoriasis can be challenging and it can threaten your self-confidence, especially when your plaques are visible. But it doesn’t have to. Meet four psoriasis warriors who have found unique ways to feel comfortable in every situation—from dating to working. If you're ever having one of those days with your PsO, you'll find comfort and inspiration in this roundtable of body-positive tips:

                                                                                                                                    iStock

Meet Our Four Warriors

• Jill Leonard, 52, Vancouver, Canada

• Sam Howe, 33, Lynchburg, Virginia

• Jill McMahon, 38, Robbinsville, New Jersey

• Aya Lew, 38, Tulum, Mexico

HeathCentral: How long have you had psoriasis and what are your main symptoms right now?

Jill L: I’ve had psoriasis for seven years. After periods of intense or prolonged stress, flare-ups of blisters full of puss appear on my feet and palms. Luckily, they’re not painful, but they’re terribly itchy so I unconsciously scratch them in my sleep until they pop. Sometimes they get infected.

Sam: I’ve had psoriasis since I was a toddler. I currently have patches that cover some of my legs and arms.

Jill M: I’ve had psoriatic arthritis for 23 years. I’m on a new biologic and the plaques are lessening even in this first month of treatment. However, upwards of 75% of my body is still covered with psoriasis spots.

Aya: I’ve had psoriasis for six years. My main symptom these days is one small spot on my lower back.

HC: Is there a social or work situation in which you feel the most self-conscious about your psoriasis? If so, how do you handle those feelings?

Jill L: Prior to the pandemic, I was self-conscious every time I shook hands with anyone, which happens a lot on a normal day. Of course, most people don’t have the habit of gawking at one’s hands, but I knew they could feel the blisters and scales. I’m the only person I know who welcomed the new social norm of not shaking hands!

I have spent years putting in considerable effort to overcome this feeling. One day, I decided to just start openly excusing myself for not shaking hands by explaining that I have psoriasis on my palms, which is not contagious. Branding myself in this way doesn’t feel comfortable, but I think it’s a good thing because I am doing my small part to help raise awareness that psoriasis is there, can happen to anyone, and it’s not a sign of poor personal hygiene.

Sam: When I was younger, especially in middle school, I was really self-conscious about my skin. I would wear long pants in the summer so people wouldn’t see my psoriasis. By the time I reached high school, I realized I would rather be comfortable than hide my skin. Now as an adult I don’t really notice my psoriasis, except when it occasionally flares up.

Jill M: I’m a single woman and my psoriasis makes me most self-conscious when I’m dating someone new. Even in the summer months, I can often hide the major sections with my fashion choices. When it comes to being intimate, there’s no getting around having to prepare my partner that my body or skin looks different and what psoriasis actually is. I find men often have dark coloured sheets and nothing makes me panic more than feeling like I’m leaving behind body dandruff all over his bed. It’s more embarrassing because it feels like I’m dirty. I handle these insecurities by sharing the reality of my psoriasis with the person prior to being intimate.

It also helps that I’m so open with my friends and family and on social media. Talking about it and being connected with the psoriasis community really helps remind me that I’m not alone. Whenever I come in contact with another person with psoriasis who is struggling with their self-confidence, I feel so much love for them. I try to remember that I need to turn that love inwards as well.

Aya: When my psoriasis was at its worst a few years ago, I was the most self-conscious about going swimming as I was in bandages and was unable to wear a bikini for years. I handled it by always telling myself that my body was just communicating, and I had to become a better listener to what it needed. By listening and being more compassionate to myself I created space for healing and taking my health back into my own hands.

HC: Can you share any great advice you’ve received or ideas you lean on?

Jill L: A very close friend of mine was a victim of sexual abuse early in her life. After long years of therapy, she finally felt empowered enough to tell me the following: ‘I suffered through it and I still suffer because of it today, but thanks to my own strength, there is someone left to suffer.’ These two experiences are not comparable in any way. But it’s a truth that can be applied to so many different situations. Whenever I get overwhelmed with insecurity, it helps me get back on my feet, blistered though they are!

Sam: I’ve come to realize my skin only has as much impact on my life as I allow it to have.

Jill M: I saw this quote on Instagram: “What makes you beautiful has nothing to do with how you look.” I’m kind, thoughtful, smart, dynamic, artistic, funny, and so much more. None of my value has anything to do with the flakiness or redness of my skin.

Aya: When I was depressed, I would remind myself that life is short, and I am grateful to be alive as others have it harder. Gratitude has brought me back from my most difficult times.

HC: How do you tap into your self-confidence when you're feeling self-conscious?

Jill L: I keep repeating to myself: People don’t react the way they do because they are mean or want to hurt me. It’s their brain that is hardwired to shrink back from anything that resembles “disease.” It’s an evolutionary trait that has probably kept us out of harm’s way more times than we can imagine. With psoriasis, as with many other things, education can help. And it’s up to us to make that happen!

Sam: I go for a run. I find exercising to be a great way to clear my head and focus on what really matters.

Jill M: If I ever feel my self-confidence waning, I try to take a few deep breaths. This simple process helps me check back in with the inner me. Often when I feel self-conscious, I’m focusing too much on the outside world and what people around me might be thinking.

Aya: Being confident in life means always showing up from a place of love, especially when you are at your worst. No matter how much pain and suffering you are going through, to know and to love yourself is the only thing that matters.

HC: What's your number-one tip to other psoriasis patients about how to feel comfortable in any situation where their psoriasis is evident?

Jill L: In life, there are things you can control and those you can’t. Psoriasis is somewhere in between: You can’t really control it, but you can manage it and learn to live with it. Instead of soaking up the perceived negativity derived from people’s instinctive reactions, change the name of the game, and open up the “p” conversation whenever you can. You will be amazed at how a person can react normally after they backed away from you only yesterday. And, you will feel good, because the same person will never make another psoriasis patient feel bad.

Sam: Self-love goes beyond skin deep. When my daughter was five years old, she developed spots all over her body and my wife and I quickly realized it was psoriasis. Once she got that diagnosis, we tried to treat it with different medications and creams, but our daughter hated the medicines, and her skin didn’t bother her. We stopped aggressively treating it and instead focused on teaching her to love herself. We helped her and those around her (teachers, other parents, etc.) understand her spots through education and awareness. One day we overheard our daughter singing a song about a cheetah with beautiful spots. In the song my daughter had named the cheetah with her name. Much like a cheetah, anyone with psoriasis can be strong, resilient, and beautiful just the way they are.

Jill M: To feel confident in situations where your skin spots are on full display, check in with yourself just before you enter the social environment and remind yourself that YOU are not your skin. I find that after a few minutes my self-consciousness and feelings of anxiety slide into the background and my personality can shine.

Aya: Own where your body is, know that it does get better, and never lose hope. Remember: When you speak about psoriasis to people who don’t understand it, you are speaking for all the silent psoriasis warriors out there who don’t have a voice.

https://www.healthcentral.com/article/body-confidence-advice-psoriasis

Living with Plaque Psoriasis as a Black Woman Isn’t Easy: Alisha Bridges Won’t Let the Disease Define Her

From essence.com

Alisha Bridges, 36, knows what it feels like to be treated differently because of how she looks. Since elementary school, Alisha has struggled with severe plaque psoriasis—a condition which causes raised, inflamed, scaly plaques that may be itchy or painful. When Alisha was young, plaque psoriasis covered 90 percent of her body, and the endless stares, giggles, and cruel comments from classmates made her feel self-conscious and isolated.

She opted out of sports like basketball because she didn’t want to wear tank tops and shorts that left her skin exposed. When she was cast in her high school play, the drama teacher singled her out and forbade her from using the makeup that everyone else was putting on.

“Oh no, that’s not for you,” Alisha was told. “I don’t know what’s going on with your skin.”

By middle school, Alisha wanted to cover up her body, and by high school, her mental health challenges began to rival her physical symptoms.

Plaque psoriasis can be stigmatizing, with one survey showing the disease carries about the same level of stigma as herpes. Many respondents also falsely believed it to be contagious.

Alisha recalls feeling judged by her peers, unattractive in school, and overwhelmed by the burden of trying to explain a chronic illness to others—one that even she didn’t fully understand. The anxiety created a vicious cycle because stress is a common trigger for plaque psoriasis flares.

The most detrimental reaction to her condition, however, came from those who she was expected to trust: her healthcare providers. Alisha experienced first-hand the lack of cultural competency displayed by too many healthcare professionals when it comes to diagnosing and treating psoriasis in people of colour—which led to delays in finding effective treatments.

Research has shown that dermatologists are less confident in diagnosing plaque psoriasis on darker skin. Medical schools, literature and case studies teach doctors to recognize the symptoms of the disease primarily on white skin, which typically appears as red patches with a flaky, silvery scale. Only 18 percent of images in dermatology textbooks showcase conditions on darker skin, which often presents with a more purple or brown color.

As a teen, Alisha began to experience symptoms of psoriatic arthritis, a type of arthritis that can be linked with psoriasis, that causes joint inflammation, in areas such as fingers and knees. Other parts of the body may also be affected, such as the areas where tendons and ligaments connect to bone. Collectively, plaque psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis are commonly referred to as psoriatic disease.

Black or other people of colour with psoriatic disease are more likely to be misdiagnosed or receive a delayed diagnosis, which can be detrimental. About 30 percent of patients with psoriasis go on to develop psoriatic arthritis, and treatment delays may result in permanent joint damage and greater disability.

“Some doctors misdiagnose psoriasis in Black people as other conditions, like eczema,” Alisha says. “As a result, we can go through a long cycle of debilitating and tragically preventable symptoms. This explains why people of colour with psoriatic disease experience lower quality of life.”

For all the doctor visits that consumed her childhood and young adulthood, Alisha says no one ever broached the subject of how the condition was affecting her emotionally. She only realized later that she was dealing with clinical anxiety and frequent panic attacks.

But in 2011, she was ready to let go of her shame and posted a metaphorical “goodbye” letter on her blog. In the letter, she committed to finally letting go of the part of herself that was ashamed to live due to her disease. She wrote, “I kill the part of me that hides… I kill the part of me that cries out… I kill the part of me that’s afraid of what people will think.”

                                                            PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF CANDACE LEDBETTER

Since writing that note, Alisha has become a full-time patient advocate working with organizations like the National Psoriasis Foundation and Janssen’s Determi-Nation initiative, which unites patients, advocates, and healthcare providers to address inequities in care for people of colour living with psoriatic disease. Alisha has become a vocal proponent of dealing with the physical and mental strains of psoriatic disease: “This is more than skin deep,” she says. “It really impacts your entire life.”

Alisha says a lack of cultural competency can impact treatment decisions, too. She recalls being prescribed a medicated shampoo for her scalp psoriasis that required her to wash her hair daily, which isn’t realistic for many Black women. Other doctors, she says, may have unconscious biases, which causes them to forgo prescribing or recommending more advanced biologic therapies.

Today, Alisha has been able to successfully manage her psoriatic disease in close partnership with a doctor that she trusts. She offers a few critical tips to help other Black women avoid the challenges she experienced on her long road to better health:

•See a specialist – A dermatologist and a rheumatologist can help you manage your psoriatic disease and find the right treatment plan for you. Alisha recommends checking out the Skin of Colour Society’s database of dermatologists who specialize in treating people of colour to find a doctor near you.
•Communicate your preferences – Make sure that your treatment plan works for you. Don’t be afraid to speak up during your appointment to ensure your preferences and needs are being heard.
•Ask about other treatment options – Biologics, for example, may be a potential treatment option for people with moderate to severe plaque psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis. Biologics use is 69 percent lower among Black patients compared to White patients living with moderate to severe psoriasis, so consider discussing biologics with your doctor to learn about your options.
•Monitor your treatment progression – If you have been prescribed a treatment and do not see any improvement within the expected timeframe, be sure to talk to your doctor about other options. Alisha’s experience serves as a pertinent example—despite her prolonged use of multiple other treatments, they proved ineffective for her skin. Later, she uncovered the reality that the effectiveness of numerous treatments in clinical trials for plaque psoriasis remains limited for women of colour.

https://www.essence.com/health-and-wellness/janssen-living-with-plaque-psoriasis/

"4 Things I Discovered After Connecting With Other People With Psoriasis"

From blogs.webmd.com

By Jordan Mendiola 

For the first year of my diagnosis, the only people who knew about my psoriasis were my immediate family and one or two friends. It was a dark place for me. I was withholding my diagnosis and concealed any marks as best I could.

Nearly 2 years later, I finally began opening up more about my psoriasis. I started by telling a few friends, more family members, and then strangers who asked what the “marks” are on my arms or legs. 

There have been numerous occasions where I met someone who also has psoriasis. Here are some of my discoveries and biggest takeaways: 

1. Food and diet affect us all. Once diagnosed with psoriasis, doctors may recommend a lot of medicine, pills, and other remedies. If those don’t work out, you must look into your nutrition and experiment with what causes inflammation versus what doesn’t.  

   Personally, chocolate and other sweets can cause inflammation. After experimenting, the cleaner the food that I eat is, the less irritation I’ll face post-meal. 

2. Constant application of products or lotion are crucial. If we leave our psoriasis marks unattended to, it can lead to even worse scarring. Do yourself a favour and apply moisturiser regularly, and then twice as much in the cold winters. 

3. The people who take care of their skin and do the extra steps required to mitigate any inflammation are going to benefit the most. This is your new reality and it’s going to require attention and extra maintenance. 

4. Own up to your skin and be brave. Nobody is going to help you overcome any internal emotions besides you. Someone can be diagnosed with psoriasis at any time in their life, and that becomes their reality. If you’ve been one of the recipients of a psoriasis diagnosis, then you have to stay strong and keep your head high, no matter how insecure it may make you feel. 

5. You’ve been faced with a tough challenge, and you will become stronger. Prior to psoriasis, I overthought my appearance. I always wanted to look my best and became obsessed with my perception to everyone else. 

   Psoriasis took away my smooth, clear skin, but it made me less concerned with being flawless or desired. I couldn’t care less if someone else doesn’t find my skin the most attractive because I have an amazing girlfriend and future wife. Samantha loves me for who I am, and that’s all I could ask for. 

Psoriasis is going to come with a bunch of challenges and adversity, but in the long run, you will survive, you will carry on with your life, and achieve what you were set out to do. One piece of advice I hope you can take is to open up about your skin conditions with others. They may be going through something similar and really need to vent to someone. We are not alone. 

https://blogs.webmd.com/psoriasis/20230309/4-things-i-discovered-after-connecting-with-other-people-with-psoriasis 

5 Affirmations for When Psoriasis Attacks Your Confidence

From healthline.com

Everyone’s experience with psoriasis is different. But at some point, all of us have likely felt defeated and alone because of the way psoriasis makes us look and feel.

When you’re feeling down, give yourself some encouragement and seek out emotional support in any way you can. Consider the following five affirmations to boost your confidence and improve your well-being.

1. Say something positive about your body

For me, hating on psoriasis used to mean hating on my body because it’s where the psoriasis lives and shows up. Since becoming a mom, my mindset about my body has changed completely.

I remind myself that my body is strong. I’m amazed with what it’s capable of doing. Thinking this way doesn’t change the fact that I still have psoriasis to deal with, but it shifts the focus. Rather than thinking of my body in a negative light, I can see it as something that I want to celebrate.

2. I’m not alone in this journey

When you’re feeling down about a flare, talk to your psoriasis people. They can be your go-to friends who you talk to about your psoriasis, or friends in the psoriasis community who also know what you’re going through.

Finding and connecting with others living with psoriasis has made having this disease so much more manageable than when I was first diagnosed. The genuine sense of togetherness and support can help lift up a miserable, flare-filled day.

3. I choose to feel happy

Often, our brains will automatically seek out and focus on the negative aspects of a situation rather than the positives. We can counter this by actively choosing to be happy.

You can also take it a step further and remind yourself of that choice by wearing something that makes you happy. It can be a bright yellow scarf, your favourite tie, or even your power lipstick. Whatever it is, put on something that can visually prompt you of your choice toward happiness.

4. I release the emotions, attitudes, and habits that no longer serve me

This is a positive way of focusing only on the things that you have control over. We have no control over the fact that we have psoriasis, but we can control how we react to it and treat it. Embracing a new mentality can release the power that psoriasis has on our emotions.

5. Go for a walk

While this isn’t exactly an affirmation, this is still about making a change. The only difference is that the change is to your physical location.

Take a break from focusing on your flare, and go out for a walk. It doesn’t have to be far or fast, but it gets your endorphins flowing. Plus, the change of scenery will be good for your mindset.

The takeaway

Psoriasis is a daily challenge, but incorporating positive affirmations into your everyday routine can be an emotional asset to your overall well-being. These are just some to get you started, but you should choose and create the ones that feel the best for you.

https://www.healthline.com/health/psoriasis/moderate-to-severe/affirmations-for-psoriasis-confidence?slot_pos=article_1&utm_source=Sailthru%20Email&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=psoriasis&utm_content=2023-01-24&apid=39239719&rvid=058431b717dcfa59c0cdd27cd0a9313769e8b3dd4ad59d88efd0ded7ddb4774e 

Psoriasis Patients Have Nothing To Hide: 5 Tips To Boost Your Self Confidence

From thehealthsite.com

On the month that is dedicated to spread awareness on Psoriasis, do not be insecure about your condition and know how you can boost self confidence

The month of August is dedicated to raising awareness about psoriasis. Thus is an autoimmune disorder that affects a big chunk of the population in this world. This disease is irritating, painful, visible on the skin. Due to what this disease looks like many people feel extremely insecure of their bodies. Many people undergo severe mental health issues as well. Patients often keep it under wraps for fear of stigma many wear long sleeves, high collars, and long pants to hide their skin lesions.

This chronic disease develops because the skin cells that protect your body from infections start to multiply at an unprecedented rate. This happens because the immune system of the body is kicked into overdrive. It loses it natural control. The disease can get triggered by external factors such as stress, environment, mental health, pollution, etc. It manifests itself on the skin as red scaly patches. This disease can happen to anybody of any age groups.

DO NOT LET PSORIASIS IMPACT YOUR LIFE!

Visible conditions on the skin can be difficult to deal with when you are constantly under public scrutiny. But, if you do not let what other people think of you affect you, you will not only feel happier but also witness a reduction in your psoriasis flare up. Psoriasis is directly connected to your mental health. Take care of your mental health and your condition will automatically start healing. This process might not be easy but know that you are not alone.

Don't Fall Prey To The Stigma, Wear What Feels Good

Psoriasis patients could be insecure about what their skin looks like. But the first step to achieving confidence, mental peace and recovery is by accepting that this condition exists, it is a part of you but it does not define you. The next step to being confident is by wearing whatever outfit you feel like wearing. You will only fee beautiful and confidant if you wear what you want and not what you are forced to. One day, you will stop fussing over the fact that your flares are visible to others.

Your Qualities As A Person Are More Important Than What You Look Like

Your skin does not define you or your personality. Remind yourself about all the good qualities that you possess. Learn to love yourself for them and also learn to love yourself despite the condition that you are suffering from. Do not dwell on negativity. You will never feel confident if you do not love yourself.

Have Open Conversations About Your Condition

Scan what kind of surroundings you are in. If you feel like they are interested to listen to you, open up and let them know about your condition. This is one way to spread awareness as well. If you are uncomfortable about it, people around you might react the same way. Making others understand that this condition exists, there is no need to tiptoe around it and you are willing to answer questions will also make you one step closer to gaining that self-confidence.

Maintain An Active Lifestyle

Exercise and activities are good for psoriasis and your mental health. Stay active and it will help boost your self-confidence. You will be able to connect with your body and eventually accept yourself. Exercise will also help reduce your stress and that can benefit your symptoms as well.

Do Not Compare Yourself With Others

Drawing comparisons with others based on how they look will only make you more insecure and inferior. You do not know if they too are suffering from any chronic disease or are insecure about themselves. This negative feeling will never let you move forward and accept yourself for who you are.

https://www.thehealthsite.com/diseases-conditions/psoriasis-patients-have-nothing-to-hide-4-tips-to-boost-your-self-confidence-902065/

Is Psoriasis Affecting Your Self-Esteem? Here’s How to Boost Confidence

From healthline.com

Psoriasis is a chronic condition that causes a build-up of skin cells on the surface of the skin. There may be visible signs of inflammation such as scales on the skin and raised plaques that present differently based on skin types:

• On light or fair skin tones, psoriasis tends to be pink or red with a silvery-white scale.
• On medium skin tones, psoriasis appears as salmon-coloured with a silvery-white scale.
• On dark skin tones, psoriasis can be violet with a grey scale or it can appear dark brown and be difficult to see.

These patches may flare up without warning.

If you’re living with psoriasis and feel self-conscious about your symptoms, you’re not alone.

Psoriasis affects more than 7.5 million Americans 20 years old and older. A 2016 study suggested that it may have a significant impact on self-esteem. However, you don’t have to let psoriasis control your life.

Here are some helpful tips on how to boost your self-confidence when coping with a psoriasis flare.

Focus on your positive qualities

Your skin is just one aspect of who you are. It doesn’t define you as a person.

When you start to feel frustrated or embarrassed about psoriasis symptoms, remind yourself of the many positive qualities that you have that other people appreciate.

It’s likely that others admire your loyalty, your intelligence, your sense of humor, or your listening skills.

Instead of dwelling on negative feelings about psoriasis, try to focus on the things you like about yourself. This may help you accept that others care more about those traits, too.

Make friends with your mirror

You might be tempted to avoid your mirror during a flare-up, but taking time to look at your skin without judgment may start to normalize your condition.

This may help you feel more comfortable with your body.

When you learn to accept that flare-ups are a regular part of life, you may begin to see psoriasis as a small part of a much bigger picture. Your skin doesn’t change your other physical attributes, such as your eyes, your smile, or your personal sense of style.

It’s also worth reminding yourself that you’re likely your own harshest critic when it comes to your appearance.

If you can learn to love your body, others can, too.

Don’t be afraid to talk about it

When you’re around people you trust, you don’t need to pretend that you don’t have psoriasis.

In fact, trying to ignore it might make things more awkward. If you seem uncomfortable discussing it, your friends and family will likely feel the same way.

A better strategy may be to address your psoriasis openly. Let your social circle know that it’s OK to ask questions. Help them understand that it’s not something they need to tiptoe around.

Talking about your condition with friends may do wonders for your confidence. It may also encourage others to open up about things that they’re insecure about.

There’s no need to hide it.

Join a support group

You may also find it helpful to join a support group to talk about your psoriasis with people who understand what you’re going through.

Sharing your experience with other people who have the same condition may be therapeutic and energising. Even if you don’t feel comfortable speaking at first, listening to your fellow support group members may provide a powerful reminder that you’re not alone.

If there aren’t any psoriasis support groups in your local area, another option is to join an online discussion forum or message board.

Feeling like you’re part of a community that accepts you without judgment may help you go about your daily life with a more confident and positive outlook.

Maintain an active lifestyle

Getting regular exercise is good for your body and your mind.

Whether it’s playing a team sport, working out at the gym, or going for a hike in the woods, staying active may help boost your confidence and make you feel more connected with your body.

Exercise also helps decrease stress, which has benefits for managing psoriasis. That’s because stress and psoriasis flares are often closely related.

If you feel stressed out about your psoriasis, it may lead to a flare-up. If you experience a flare-up, it may cause you more stress.

Anything you can do to manage your stress levels may help minimize the severity of your psoriasis symptoms and improve your overall quality of life.

Wear what feels good

You may be tempted to hide psoriasis patches with clothes that cover up your skin, but wearing long sleeves and pants during the summer isn’t always comfortable or fun.

Give yourself permission to wear the clothes that you feel most comfortable in, even if they don’t hide your psoriasis.

You’ll feel more confident when you’re dressed in something you like, rather than something you feel forced to wear.

Fashion is a form of expression. Any opportunity you can take to express yourself is a chance to separate your sense of identity from your psoriasis.

Venture outside your comfort zone

When you start to feel down about your psoriasis, venturing outside your comfort zone may help you challenge your negative emotions and build your confidence.

Consider pushing yourself to do things that your psoriasis has held you back from in the past. For example, say yes when someone invites you to a party, or wear shorts or a dress when you go to the beach.

The more you push yourself to live a free and full life with psoriasis, the less power the condition will have over you. It may not be easy at first, but it will absolutely be worth it.

The takeaway

There’s currently no cure for psoriasis, but treatment can manage symptoms. And learning how to be confident in your own skin may greatly reduce its emotional impact.

If you find yourself struggling to manage self-esteem issues related to your psoriasis, don’t be afraid to ask your doctor about mental health support.

They may refer you to a mental health specialist who can help you develop a positive relationship with your body, as well as strategies for coping with the emotional challenges that psoriasis may pose.

https://www.healthline.com/health/psoriasis/confidence-strategies?slot_pos=article_1&utm_source=Sailthru%20Email&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=psoriasis&utm_content=2022-05-24&apid=39239719&rvid=058431b717dcfa59c0cdd27cd0a9313769e8b3dd4ad59d88efd0ded7ddb4774e 

How to Be Kind to Yourself When You Have Psoriasis

From everydayhealth.com

By Howard Chang

Years of insensitive comments (and worse) can make you feel undeserving of love — even self-love. But there are ways to turn off the negative voices in your head 

At the end of our family’s weekly video call, my wife, Lori, reminded us to perform a random act of kindness (RAK). She used to teach her middle school students about RAKs before she left her job to raise our kids, and today she is the family “RAKtivist.” I appreciate her efforts — after all, helping others is a big reason why I became a minister.

A CNN article on RAKs affirms some of the potential health benefits we receive from our altruistic activities: a sense of community, lower blood pressure, pain reduction, and happiness. It’s a win-win to practice kindness and volunteer to help others. 

Still, as much as I value RAKs, when other people offer me kindness or help, I’ve always been reluctant to accept. I was raised believing it’s better not to owe others, that generosity always comes with strings attached. I internalized the message that I needed to go it alone.

And when my life became difficult or overwhelming, I was too closed off emotionally to ask for help. As a result, I turned feelings of failure against myself.

Having psoriasis compounded that self-doubt.

Psoriasis Can Harm Your Self-Esteem

Psoriasis isolated me in ways that I am only now coming to understand. As a child and teen with a stigmatizing skin disease I naturally pulled away from others. The teasing, insensitive questions about my psoriatic skin, and bullying became too much to manage. Withdrawal and avoidance seemed like the best way to protect myself.

Even though I became an overachiever in academics and sports, I thought of myself as dumb, unlovable, and inferior. I became my own harshest critic, especially when it came to my psoriasis.

I’ve blamed myself for having psoriasis, as if I did something wrong to get it. If my psoriasis flared, I would chastise myself for triggering it. When a medication didn’t work well, I wondered if I’d taken it incorrectly. Low self-esteem, shame, and doubt became the air I breathed each day. I didn’t feel like I deserved kindness, either from others or myself.

Self-love is good for your mental health and your psoriasis.Lucas Ottone/Stocksy

Self-Blame Can Give Way to Self-Compassion

I began to put less pressure and lay less blame on myself as I grew in my personal faith. Even though others rejected me, I believed that God never did. I found a life-transforming acceptance in my wife and through my friends and faith community.

I could start to see that having psoriasis could be a life experience through which I could advocate for others in similar circumstances.

It still can be hard for me to accept help or kindness. But I’m learning that living in community with others means sometimes giving and at other times receiving. I now see the importance of applying self-compassion in a way that combats a lifetime of self-negativity and harshness.

Being kinder to myself has benefited my psoriasis, too. It’s released me to live more freely and have more capacity to care for myself. Since stress can trigger my psoriasis, the calm that comes with self-acceptance reduces the chance of flares.

Positive Self-Talk Is a Useful Strategy

My therapist once told me something that felt earth-shattering at the time: Not every thought you have is true. So much of my self-talk came from a place of negativity. Instead, he helped me identify when I needed to treat myself more gently.

I noticed the change in my self-talk after my psoriasis flared on a recent trip.

Traveling can trigger my psoriasis. For example, when I’m driving to see my parents in Southern California during the winter months, I worry about snow over the mountains heading toward Los Angeles, and I’m concerned about passing COVID-19 or some other illness to my elderly mom and dad.

On a recent trip, the rental car’s heavy air-freshener smell added to the list of hazards, since perfume can worsen my skin inflammation and allergies. At first, I scolded myself for not returning the car and getting a different one. When I felt skin discomfort, I blamed myself.

Then I reminded myself that I can learn from the experience by speaking up next time. The flare I experienced, I told myself, would eventually go away. Those thoughts helped me enjoy the trip despite the difficulties.

Downtime and Breaks May Be the Self-Care You Need

Taking breaks and making room for downtime are ways to show kindness to yourself.

For almost 25 years I worked six- to seven-day weeks with two weeklong vacations each year. I felt driven to succeed and not let others down. But by the beginning of the pandemic, I experienced burnout. I’ve wondered if the constant stress and lack of rest worsened my psoriasis and health in general.

I requested an extended break from work, which was reluctantly granted. In typical fashion, I decided to fill those four months with lots of activities. But with COVID-19 lockdowns looming I had to cancel trips and plans. That downtime at home turned out to be exactly what I needed to force me to slow down and adopt a healthier lifestyle.

Later, I chose to be kinder to myself by incorporating more downtime. I switched to a more flexible job that came with less pressure. I also added breaks into my weekly work rhythms such as walks, coffee runs, or time out to read a book.

These changes have given me the capacity to handle what life throws at me, including better managing my health and psoriasis. I have time to think, exercise regularly, and prepare more healthful meals.

I’m glad my wife introduced random acts of kindness to our family. They taught me the value of kindness every day. By extension, showing kindness to yourself is important too, especially when you live with a challenging condition like psoriasis.

Important: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and not Everyday Health.

https://www.everydayhealth.com/columns/howard-chang-the-itch-to-beat-psoriasis/how-to-be-kind-to-yourself-when-you-have-psoriasis/

‘What My Mother’s Battle With Psoriasis Taught Me About Living With It Myself’

From womenshealthmag.com

After learning they were both living with the skin disease, blogger Sabrina Skiles set out on a mission: empowering others with chronic conditions to practice self-love 

I was a junior in high school when I suddenly noticed I had developed these red, raised patches on my elbows. They felt very different from the rest of my skin, and I had no idea what was going on, so I showed them to my mom. Her casual response surprised me. She simply told me that it was psoriasis, a skin disease that causes an itchy rash, and that she has it, too.

Her calmness assuaged any thoughts of being scared or nervous. She made me an appointment with a dermatologist who confirmed the diagnosis: I had psoriasis.

My mom had never mentioned psoriasis before, but as I learned more about the disease, I realized the signs had been there all along. She rubbed her elbows sometimes because they itched from the disorder, and she would scratch her head more than most people because she also suffered from scalp psoriasis. 

I also learned that this was a chronic disease, something that wasn't ever going to go away.

                                                                                     PHOTO COURTESY OF SABRINA SKILES

Being diagnosed with a chronic health condition when you’re 15 can be a lot to process. Thankfully, my mom guided and supported me throughout my journey. I started having conversations with her about what it meant to live with psoriasis and how she coped with flares. I was also curious to know why we had never talked about this before. Her answer was simple: It had never really come up.

My mom made it all seem so normal. (Although she did share at one point that she secretly hoped her children would never develop this skin disease.) And she didn’t equate her appearance with her worth. However, I was still a teenager, and like other teens, the main concerns were how people would perceive my skin and what other kids would say. During one flare, my body was 90 percent covered in red, scaly plaques. But I felt like if psoriasis didn’t bother my mom, why should it bother me?

I eventually got to a point where I just didn’t care. I spoke to people about my psoriasis when I caught them looking at my rashes or when they asked, but I was very casual about it, like my mom, and I felt confident talking about what I was going through, thanks to her conversations with me.

                                The 37-year-old in her hometown of Denver, CO, taking photos for her blog

                                                                                                           CHRIS SKILES

I’m 37 now, and a blogger, and my mom is the reason I’m so big on body positivity and health advocacy. Her attitude toward her psoriasis has impacted so much of how I look at beauty. It helped me focus on learning more about my condition and what I could do about it rather than dwelling on how it would negatively impact my life. I’ve learned there are ways you can manage it— including little tricks to cope, like choosing certain fabrics that won’t irritate my skin and keeping a travel-size lotion on me at all times to soothe my skin whenever flares happen.

My mom passed away nine years ago, and I now have two young kids. I’m passing on her philosophy of beauty, using my psoriasis as a teaching opportunity. I tell my children how important it is to know that having a condition like this doesn’t define who you are or how beautiful you feel—and I have my mom to thank for that.

https://www.womenshealthmag.com/beauty/a39139743/what-my-mothers-battle-with-psoriasis-taught-me-about-living-with-it-myself/