From healthcentral.com
By Meaghan Quirin
It starts with setting realistic expectations for the season
For me, managing holiday stress with psoriatic arthritis (PsA) really comes down to protecting my energy: physically, emotionally, and socially. The holidays can be so joyous, but they can also be exhausting. Between navigating endless to-do lists, family dynamics, colder weather, travel, and packed calendars, it’s a time of year that can push my body and nervous system past their limits pretty quickly if I’m not intentional about how I move through it.
I’ve learned to start by setting realistic expectations. I used to say yes to everything, every invitation, every tradition, every last-minute errand because I didn’t want to let people down or miss out. But now I’m much more honest with myself about what I actually have the capacity for. I ask: What matters most to me this season? What can I let go of? That alone takes so much pressure off.
I also try my best to plan ahead in ways that reduce the chaos. I spread things out over a few weeks instead of cramming errands and prep into one weekend. I look at what else is on my calendar before committing to anything new, and I make sure to block off time for rest, especially if I know something will require more energy or recovery, like travel or a family gathering.
Comfort is another big part of how I get through the season. I’ve let go of trying to look perfectly put together in ways that don’t actually feel good. These days, I’m prioritizing warm layers, soft clothes, supportive shoes and whatever else helps me stay grounded and comfortable in my body. If that means showing up to the holiday party in sneakers and carrying heat packs in my bag, so be it.
Emotionally, I try to give myself space to feel whatever’s coming up. The holidays can stir up grief and frustration of not being able to participate the way I want to. I don’t force myself to be cheerful if I’m not feeling it. But I also try to stay open to small moments of joy and connection, even if they don’t look like I envisioned. Some years, that means new traditions, or quieter ones; it’s saying no to protect my peace and not feeling bad about it.
More than anything, I remind myself that I don’t need to earn rest or prove anything to anyone. Living with PsA means I already have to be mindful of how I use my energy all year long, but during the holidays, I double down on that to avoid stress and burnout. It’s not about doing everything. It’s about doing what matters, in a way that is mindful of how I feel!
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